MARLEY THE MAN HATING MASTIFF

Posted: July 23, 2010 in Uncategorized


MARLEY

Marley
is a 9 year old Old English Mastiff.  Our son brought him from Florida
when he was a puppy after our St Bernard died.  St Bernard’s belong in
Switzerland not in Haiti.  Lesson learned.  Mastiffs are a perfect fit
for Haiti.  Their size intimidates, their love of sleep makes them a
perfect guard dog.  A thief would trip over them as John says.   They
take up half the floor and when roused they make quite an appearance.
 They love kids, they love women, and men – not so much, at least for Marley.
Marley lives at the maternity center with his granddaughter Dolly.  He
has weathered the change from kids to pregnant women and has settled in
with new mistresses.  He made an appearance at prenatals and has decided
that is where he belongs.  Right in the middle of the class.  Women who
are used to rat sized dogs were not sure what to make of this lion
sized animal who plops down in the middle of prenatals.  He will not be
put outside.  Come try to make him.  He glues himself to the floor and
will not be moved.  He probably weighs more than many adults and has the
ability to weigh even more when being told what to do.  Trick him with
food and he may move but he’ll trick you and be right back where he
wants to be in short order.
He loves the women, lays down belly up hoping for a pat or at least
crumbs from their noon meal.  He lies down more than he does anything
else which is understandable since he is an old fella.  All this changes
when a man comes to the gate.
He begrudgingly accepts the yard man, he genuinely loves John, Robert
Rice and Reynald and that would be about it.  End of the man list.
One hundred women can pass through the gate without him rousing from his
nap.  Let him sniff a man and the lion comes alive!  He jumps up, heads
for the gate and does a block that a football player would be proud of.
 No men allowed.  He barks deep and frightening.  He uses his giant
mastiff head and blocks all movement.  He shakes that massive head and
slobber goes flying.  He barks incessantly with a deep growl that sends
men to the other side of the gate shaking.  We women are cruel – we
laugh!
We’ve laid down the law that Marley cannot attend births.  We locked him
outside.  He was quite offended and kept going from door to door trying
to sneak in.  God help the poor papa who decides to wait out the labor
on the porch.  This will not be pretty.
The women are figuring out that Marley is part of the house, certainly
part of our community of women.  He’s our guard, protector and garbage
disposal.  He forgets to chew when eating, shamelessly bothers people
until they pet him and rolls in the mud right after his bath.
 Everyone’s safe with Marley in the house – unless you’re a man.

Beth McHoul

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